Thursday, October 13, 2011

What Comes out of the Womb

There is an angry generation of youth roaming these urban streets. Their anger and bitterness was seeded, processed and developed in the "womb." By the time my son was 14; he had done any and everything but come right out and ask me to kill his tail! And on a few occasions, I was very much tempted to take him out of his misery. Today, we sit and laugh about those times as I share with him the reasons that my "own" mother threatened to take me out of MY misery. It would be easy and justified, to blame his absent father on many of the occasions. However, only "I" am the influence that raised him; which was a blessing in disguise. Nope, I never received a dollar in child support. At age 6 his father brought me $200. on his way to the airport; headed to ATL to get his life 'straight'. Was I angry about no financial support? NOPE. Was I angry about his absence? NOPE. How could I be angry, when I put the cart before the horse and got pregnant before marriage? How could I be bitter about his absence when he never kept a job? How could I be angry about him not spending time with my son when every time he went into drug re-hab; not many days passed before he was getting high again? The things I've mentioned are not to 'dog' his father, but rather to open some of these angry bitter women's eyes.

First of all, suing for child support also brings visitation rights by law. Now, what would I do if my child grew into an angry young man whose father's example he followed? My heart would have broken if my child had turned into a 'petty' street hustler that got hooked on his own product. Because had his father been given access to his mind; my child would be a thug! ~realtalk~ My genetic make-up combined with his father's genetic make-up is the very reason at age 21 my foot is still up his tail! Instead of being angry and bitter with the happenings; seek God for the reasons of the 'happenings'.

There is no need to 'dog' the father to the child or encourage the child to curse themselves by disrespecting the father. My son and I are living witnesses that the 'source' provides all of your needs whether you deserve it or not. What I have always taught and encouraged my son was to pray for his father. See him even if you don't want to. You never want him to leave this earth and your last memory being NOT seeing him the last time that he tried.




During my 3rd month of pregnancy; I embraced the fact that I would be a single mother. Being an artist that loves all music; my clients enjoyed smooth jazz as I worked from home. The blessing was being able to cook all of my meals and schedule my naps lmbo! When my son was about 13, he surprised me and sang "Unforgettable" in a school talent show. I thank God for giving me the wisdom to embrace beautiful music and great books instead of being a pregnant bitter woman.