Ordinary day

"ORDINARY DAY"

It was an ordinary day,
The sun was shinning brighter than ever before,
People were passing me by,
Smiling and laughing showing no cares at all,
When something felt strange,
All of a sudden the sky turned grey,
And then the voice; yes, there was a voice,
The voice said you must change,
I know from where you came,
I know your hidden shame,
Ex-prostitutes, ex-drug dealers and murders alike,
I know your hidden shame,
I know from where you came,
Your discarded un-loved babies, are now my planted seeds in the concrete of their ghettos,
Like the fertile soil of the promised land,
I will deliver them into My Kingdom,
Because the children are the flowers in the ghetto,
They are the stones that the builders have rejected,
And they will be the capstone,
See the Lord has done this,
and it is marvelous in our eyes,
He said that the children are the flowers in the ghetto,
And He spoke this to me,
On an ordinary day.

Free Spirit

I am who I am,

I am who I am meant to be,
I love who I am.
There are those that don’t’ know me,
And there are those who don’t want to know me,
I am the core, of whom they are afraid to see,
I am the one who’s not afraid to be me.
My spirit is free my spirit is bold,
When I am honest, people say that I’m cold.
Although I get lonely, because I am me,
It’s not my fault that my spirit can see.
Inside the tunnel lives the vision of truth.
My spirit invades my human vision so that I can see,
I’m considered strange because I am real.
I can’t be deceived although I pretend to be naive,
I often sit alone, accepting the essence of peace,
Allowing the spirit to send me stories in picture,
Allowing the peace to ease my mind;
Feeling the energy so gentle and kind.
Because I have accepted who I am meant to be,
My spirit is free, and that’s why I love me.

Chocolate Passion

Hidden in my secret desires,Are the flames of love,That have many flavors,Of chocolate.Inspires.Igniting flames of fire,Sending signals like live wires,To my brain,Setting my heart on fire.Caramel chocolate,Vanilla chocolate,Almond, mocha or dark berryChocolate.Something mystical about, This flavor,Mothing but sweetness,Do i savor.Through my passion,Got me baskin',In a glow of love,So i'm askin',What's more delightful?Teasin' me an eye-ful,Love so strong to die-for,Passion so sweet,I'm addicted,Makin' me weak,In this heat,I'm melting.Un-guarded,Invades while i'm dreamin',Twist and turn,Got me screamin'.It's a shame,How it takes me,Out of my mind,Got me burnin',How i love it.Chocolate so strong,Got me yearnin',It's a shame how it leaves me,With no shame,All this teasin'.Got me searchin',For my hot-spot,Scent so sweet,Found my courage.Through your soul,Im gonna show you,What was stolen,
I will restore you.When god made,The heavens and earth,He reached into the dirt,Sculpted and molded,The divine god, In his image.So sweet,I can't imagine,Any other flavor,Igniting my passion.So again i'm askin',What's more delightful,Than deep chocolate passion?!

Lost Love

We used to know each other well
The bond of love would always take away the pain
Even after the master came to take her to his bed
Her husband would hold her gently, as she cried the night away
She would always feel the humiliation in her mind
In her heart, the anger would die
Because her husband held her as she cried
We used to know each other well
Although we felt as though we lived in hell
We sang and danced as the master watched
Trying to figure out what we were so happy about
As he watched them take his sons to their new masters
He kept his back straight, as the tears burned his cheeks
Holding her back, to keep her from being the next to be beaten
She would sob so deeply, that her chest would throb
Holding her unborn, praying for her taken son, praying to God
We used to know each other well
Feeding each other, loving each other and always with a smile
After we were set free, there was an undeniable bond
If I had a home, we each had a home
If I had food, we each had food to eat
If I had a dollar, we each had fifty cents
As we thought times were getting better, we fell apart
We didn't kill rape or poison our young
If there was a secret, we didn't tell
When Mother got sick, her neighbor would look after her young
When Father couldn't find work, his brother would lend a hand
As if by some strange mystical power, we could feel each other's pain
Not understanding why, only knowing that God meant it to be
Later in years, sometime ago
We would have never watched another family being thrown into the streets
Our mind, body, and souls were not for sale
But, that's when we used to know each other well

The people we love are the ones that can hurt us the most!

For many African American women that I know; we grew up without our fathers. As Mother's day is approaching and I fight the urge to be sad. I realize how blessed I am. No; my mother is not here with me any longer but my Daddy is.
As a child; I drove my mother crazy looking for my Daddy. I've always had an investigative mind and would always seem to be able to track him down. It wasn't until I was about 11 or 12 years old that I could no longer find him. Then, I started checking the obituary section of the news papers to make sure he wasn't dead. I remember praying for God to keep him safe and even begging God to show me where to look. God never failed me in my requests either. For, I didn't have to look. We would be traveling in the car with my Mother and who would we see walking down the street or standing on the corner drinking from a brown paper bag; my DADDY! I would be so angry at him and my Mother. Him for being an addict and my Mother for speeding up so that I couldn't jump out the car to tell him about himself!
You see, I was always a Daddy's girl and was proud of it! It wasn't my intention to make my stepfathers feel unwanted but I had a Daddy and I wasn't calling nobody else Daddy but my own Daddy! hmmphf!
I'll never forget my 16th birthday. I stepped outside the side entrance of Kenwood high school to walk across the street to restaurant Sea Fruit for lunch and who do I see; standing off to the side looking all sheepish? My Daddy! I didn't know if I wanted to hug him or curse his a*** out for making me worry. It wasn't until my high school graduation that I finally told my mother; I was secretly spending time with him. I just didn't want anybody to call me stupid again for always looking for him. She was so angry; not because of me and my father's secret. But because I had given him a ticket to my high school graduation and her husband; my second step father announced he wasn't attending. Not if "that" n**** was coming; that is. And of course; me with my smart mouth, told him to stay his illiterate a*** at home then. sighhhhhhhhhhhhhhh That outburst was the beginning of the dissension that he used to break me and my mother's bond. Only; my step father didn't know; I've never been one to give up on anything. Especially my parents; as crazy as they both were. I was their rock!
Well, here I am excited that my Daddy will be celebrating 19 years of sobriety this year. When my son was 5 years old; he sat next to me at my Daddy's college graduation from Roosevelt University. I was so proud of my Daddy on that day! It wasn't until my mother made her transition that I realized; God had answered my prayers. From the day that she took her last breath until the day she was buried; my Daddy catered to my every emotional need!
Today, he's helping me to overcome my abandonment issues. Sometimes I get angry because he treats me like I'm still a little girl. And most times; I overstand that it's the little girl in me that needed the attention and nurturing the most! His wife teases me and calls me his first wife so I'm gonna be nice this year. He and I will have dinner the Sunday before Mother's Day and he can pamper his wife on Mother's Day. But she already knows; Father's Day belongs to ME! LMBO! (I know; I'm a brat) But, thanks to my Daddy, I'm not afraid to love anymore. One thing I do know for sure; If I hadn't forgiven my father, I would have deprived my son of the great relationship that he and his grand father share!


"She prayed for God to heal her heart yet her heart would not release the anger and bitterness that held her mind captive in a state of darkness"................
Click the link and purchase your copy of.......... "How to Grow out of the Wilderness"

How to Grow out of the Wilderness (book excerpt)

The man she thought was her fiance drove her to the doctor for her final examination after losing “Little Jay”. Derrick took her for lunch and a little talk when they left the doctor’s office. As they ate, he apologized for his lack of compassion and absence in the previous weeks. He told her that he had been dating one of her so-called friends and that he was sorry for hurting her. Derrick didn’t want her to hear it through the grapevine, so he told on himself. The truth was that he felt guilty as he watched Tonya suffer the loss of their child and her mother. He felt like crap when Tonya stood and threw her ice water in his face as she stormed out of the restaurant. He called after her as she walked out of the restaurant, leaving him talking to the back of her head as she walked away. He stood with tears in his eyes as he watched Tonya walk out of his life. She was determined not to allow another person to witness her having another melt down.Tonya walked from the restaurant to the church to pick up Malik. Crying all the way there, she was thinking of a way to leave the country. She chained smoked cigarettes until she smelled like a walking chimney. Entering the lower sanctuary of the church, she waited for the doorkeeper to call for Malik. Malik came running out to greet Tonya excited, and wanted to stay for bible study. Tonya, being exhausted mentally and physically; promised him that they would attend the following week, but Malik insisted. He demanded to stay; that was it and that was all. He walked away leaving Tonya talking to herself the same way she had just left Derrick standing alone in the restaurant. She sat down to gain her composure as she talked to the thin air that was beginning to choke her. As Tonya sat there she prayed for God to give her a sign. He didn’t just give her a sign; he gave her his promise.Where Tonya was sitting was in the first row of seats in the bible study class. Not only did bible study begin before she could leave, but there was a new Pastor. He and his wife came in like nothing Tonya had ever witnessed. They used computers, projection screens and were just as radical as Tonya. When the Pastor gave the scripture for the study that night, Tonya knew she was where she was supposed to be. (Jeremiah 29:11 For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.)

Do You Stop to Heal? (Taking it to the root)

Last night while working on the pre-production for my new CD; as much as I wanted to start on something else, my spirit wouldn't let me. As I was writing "How to Grow out of the Wilderness"; I was being delivered from so many of my issues that I would litterally fight with depression. Many people will ask, "how can you fight depression" and you say you're being delivered? Simple, Deliverence means that old wounds and past hurts will rise up and stare you square in the eye; just when you're feeling free of an issue or past hearbreak.

Unfortunately, when this happens people make the fatal mistake of saying, "the devil is a liar." I'm here to testify that "christians" give that punk satan more power than it can even handle. Why would God reveal a past hurt or heartbreak; just when you're growing out of a level in your "Wilderness"; unless the intention was for you to take that thing to the root and destroy it! You "MUST" stop to heal! That thing from the past sets us back because God wants us to humble ourselves; look at ourselves "HONESTLY", acknowledge to ourselves our accountabillity in that thing, and allow God to show you what must go and what can be revised.

A closed mind can't and won't learn, just like a hardened heart won't be healed until you, STOP TO HEAL.........

Do You Stop to Heal

Yesterday has come and gone but

You just can't let it go

Today is a brand new day

So you choose how it flows

Since tomorrow's not promised to anyone

I'm thankful for today

Intentions good or bad can

Be your greatest lesson

Consequences roll and

Can be your biggest blessing

See what you see the right way

And you choose how it grows 

Each day that you wake and you pray be

Thankful for all things

Each night as you pray before sleep be

Humbled soul and repenting

Since tomorrow's not promised to anyone

I'm thankful, living for today

Do you stop to feel the rain

Do you stop to feel the shame

Do stop to heal the pain

Or do you let it fester; boiling in your heart

Do you Stop to Heal?

Giving birth to my child was the most painful experience of my life!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Many women will agree that natural child birth had them calling out for the death angel to come take them out of their misery. lol But when the spirit is birthing something new in you, all you have to call on is God. Sometimes, I believe that people have turned to drugs and alcohol or even prescription meds, just to ease the pain of spiritual birth. Being unaware of who you are makes it most uncomfortable when your purpose introduces itself.

 You see; your purpose will hunt you down even if you don't know your purpose. The mind of the flesh may not have a clue, but your spirit does. This is the reason the enemy works non-stop at keeping your ears disconnected from the speaking of your spirit. Without proper meditation the evolving process can be overwhelming. If we as sisters, can be honest with ourselves and each other, we will heal and rise above the distractions of past pain and hurt and evolve into our true QUEEN!


The key of course, is recognizing that yesterday has come and gone. With today being a new day, live in this day of new opportunities. The ones who hurt you yesterday only have power over your joy today; if you continue to hold on to their actions of yesterday. Which by the way; you can do nothing about because yesterday is dead and gone.




If we as women; stop to heal. We must lear to embrace the theory that love is not what you get but rather what you give. Give the old hurt to the trash bin and open yourselves up to a new a greater flow of love.